India Update - I'm having my cake and eating it too!

Okay, so here's the deal. Initially I was supposed to go to India for 6 weeks and depart from the states on January 7, 2009. In doing this I was going to put off my graduation by 1 semester. I wasn't very pleased about the matter, but when God says go. Go!

There were several requirements that I had put on myself in order to go for the 6 weeks.

1. I could not be the only other person there along with Dan, our guide.

2. The classes that I needed to take had to be offered in the fall so I could graduate.

3. I had to come up with the money.

4. I had to have the blessing and go-ahead from my parents.

All seemed to be going as planned. Life was great, but then some things changed and kind of threw me a curve ball.

1. I was going to be the only other person there for the remaining 4 weeks after the rest of group went home.

2. The classes I need to graduate are only offered in the spring.

Needless to say, I had some decsions to make. After much prayer, my solution came to me. Go for 2 weeks with the whole group and then come home and finish out the spring semester.

Here's how it worked out. Our trip has been moved up. We are now departing on January 3, 2007 (which is a Saturday at 1:15p.m.). We will arrive in India on January 5 - yeah, that's a really long flight!!! We will be staying at the Hope orphanage for approxiamtely 10 days and then be returning home. We will arrive at Will Roger's World airport on January 17, 2009 (which is also a Saturday) at 11:40p.m.

That's not all! Since classes start on January 12, I've talked to all of my professors for next semester and they are totally cool with me missing the first week of classes. Some are even allowing me to use the images I shoot while in India for some of my projects in the classes.

So, not only do I get to go to India, I get to graduate too! God is SO good. I don't know why I even worry about the details, because he always works them out for me.

You know the old saying "You can't have your cake and eat it too."? Well it's wrong. When you let God work everything out for you, He let's you eat it. Why wouldn't He? Cake is awesome!

I'm Going to India!

I just wanted to let all of you know that I am going to India on a mission trip! I will leave January 7, 2009 and be there for 6 weeks. I am very excited!!! Please be in prayer that I will have enough sponsors. Unfortunately it takes a lot of money to minister to people on the other side of the globe. My team and I will be working with widows and orphans in particular as well as villagers struck by poverty.

Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers! Let me know if you want more info, I'd be happy to tell you everything I know = D

"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you."

-James 1:27 (NLT)

Me and the Chain Link Fence

I have needed to write a blog on submission (because God told me to) for a while now. But I didn’t do it because submitting my will, plans, opinions, ideas… and control is really hard. And how could I write a blog telling people to submit to God when submission is still an issue that I have to work on everyday?

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I just feel like I can work out a situation on my own. I don’t really need anyone to help me out or tell me their opinion. How ignorant I am sometimes.

Just recently I’d been struggling (hard-core) to submit my heart to Him in a certain matter. I wanted to and even tried at times but there was a disconnect somewhere. I knew that I had not truly given it over to God because I kept thinking and obsessing about it (which is a pretty good sign that I was trying to be in control). (grins to self)

So… how did I come to the place to submit my will in this circumstance to God?

Well, it’s pretty simple really. I tried over and over and over and over (well you get the point) again to make things happen the way I wanted them to and EVERY SINGLE TIME something went wrong. It’s almost like what I wanted was on the other side of a chain link fence and I was so close to getting it, but I just couldn’t. Basically I got tired of always failing. So after a few tears and a lot of disappointment I realized that I simply cannot control everything. BUT God can! (Amen and hallelujah!)

Understanding and believing are two totally different things. I’ve always understood that God has my best interest at heart and works out everything in my life for my good… but as for believing, I can’t say that I truly did.

Believing that God can take care of me is SO liberating!!! I no longer have to stress about making everything work out, because He does that for me.

So if you want some hard-core liberation come to the end of yourself and submit to God. It truly will change your life!

I'm certainly NOT perfect. I still have to choose to submit my will to God everyday... but I'm working on it. Maybe we can work on it together!

The Gaps and the Babies - Babies

This is “PART 2 the Babies”. In my last post I dealt with the gaps in our teeth and spiritual walk. Now I am dealing with the babies. I encourage you to read my last two posts (Lessons From Braces? and The Gaps and the Babies – Gaps) before reading this one as it will aid you in your understanding of the message.

Baby teeth are good while you are a child because they fit your mouth. But as you get older and mature your bone structure changes and your jaw gets bigger. This is why we have adult teeth (God was pretty thorough when He created the human body). Baby teeth are only good for a short amount of time as they are not meant to be in your mouth forever.

After you’ve lost most of your baby teeth and your mature adult teeth have grown in you will notice a difference in size. The new, mature ones are a lot bigger than the babies.

When I first got my braces (ask me to tell you the story of my first screening sometime, it’s pretty funny) I still had baby teeth. When I went in for my screening the orthodontist told me that I had baby teeth and although he could give me braces I would eventually have to have surgery on my mouth. My adult teeth were stuck in my jaw bone and couldn’t come down on their own.

So I did get braces… and it hurt (don’t believe the people who tell you otherwise because they are lying)! After a while of having them on the time came when they told me I had to have my surgery because my treatment would no longer be beneficial without it. I asked them, “Can’t I just keep my babies? I don’t want to have to go through the pain!” They told me that I couldn’t because after a while my baby teeth would rot away as they are not meant to be in your mouth for an extended period of time. So I had surgery.

Okay, now for the lesson… you were thinking that I would never get to it, weren’t you?

When we first come to Christ we are like the “Babies”. We are supposed to read the Word, grow our relationship with Christ, and become mature Christians. Sometimes we choose not to do that and remain “Baby Christians”.

But this is extremely dangerous. Remaining an immature Christian will cause God not to be able to use you as much as He would like. If you do not grow and never become mature, you will likely become just like my baby teeth and rot away. Your relationship with the Father will be quenched and you will fall away from Him.

“A farmer went out to plant some seeds… seeds that fell on the shallow soil with underlying rock spouted quickly because the soil was shallow. But the plants soon wilted under the hot sun, and since they didn’t have deep roots, they died.”

Matthew 13:3, 5-6

The Gaps and the Babies - Gaps

In my last blog I mention that my teeth (before braces) were an overall mess. Filled with gaps and babies.

But I didn’t really explain the spiritual similarity of this, so I am now. But because the lessons are so good they deserve their own entries (grins to self). So this is PART 1 focusing on the gaps.

Gaps between teeth are no good. They allow food to get stuck between your teeth this can look gross and feel uncomfortable too. They also can cause all kinds of bad stuff to happen like cavities which require a lot of trips to the dentist to get the problems fixed. They can also make you feel insecure with your smile and like you need a lot of work to become attractive.

Ready for the spiritual lesson? Good!

Gaps are like the chasm that separates us from God. Things get put in the gap to make it bigger and bigger which separates us from Christ even more. In our own power we cannot get to God. It was only through His son, Jesus Christ, dying on the cross that a way was made.

We cannot close the gaps in our teeth by ourselves. It requires braces and a retainer (see my last post for the spiritual lesson about that). That chasm that separates us from the one true, holy, and just God can never be bridged in our own efforts. It requires God, the “bridger” of all gaps, the ultimate orthodontist! (Grins to self).

So how do we get across the giant gap?

Well it’s quite simple. Since we cannot bridge the gap ourselves; we simply walk over the one that Jesus has already made for us. Ask for forgiveness of your sins and tell God that you want the chasm that separates you from Him to be done away with. Tell Him that you want a relationship with Him, and ask Him to live in your heart. There is nothing we can do to get to God, except acknowledge that in our own power we can’t do it and then ask Him to do it for us. Because He is the ALMIGHTY and can do anything!!!

I encourage you, get rid of the gaps. I’m glad I did!

Spiritual Lessons From Braces?

Something I've been learning lately is that the things we dislike most and cause us the most problems are really what mold and shape us.

I had braces for 3 years and 9 months (a stinkin' long time). I hated everything about them. The pain they brought, the inconvenience they were, and the general displeasure they brought me.

My braces were taken off on Friday! Praise Him!

My teeth before the braces looked completely different than what they do now. Before they had gaps and some of them were babies. An over all mess. But the braces fixed all of my problems and now my teeth look wonderful.

The thing is that I have to wear a retainer all the time to keep my teeth in perfect alignment. Without it, my teeth would go right back to their natural positions. Even after all that time, effort, pain, and discomfort.

"So what's the lesson?" you may be asking. Well, read on I tell you!

What I've learned is this.

As sinners, we are like my old teeth. Unable to be fixed by our own efforts. It requires a force greater than our own (That's JESUS, by the way) to make the changes. Sometimes the changes are painful and they hurt, they bring us unhappiness and occasionally discouragement.

But the very thing that causes us pain is the thing that grows us into a more beautiful creature and more pleasing to God. The changes create alignment with God (and let me tell you, you want to be aligned with God!!!).

But it doesn't stop there. The "Jesus Braces" aren't enough. Submitting our sin and making the initial changes isn't enough. We need a retainer.

We are not going to remain on the right track without a "Spiritual Retainer". This retainer is the Holy Spirit. We have to have the Holy Spirit in our lives to guide us and keep us in check. The Holy Spirit is our power over sin and our power over Satan, himself. Without the Holy Spirit it is impossible to walk in victory over Satan and the powers of darkness. It is impossible to live a life victorious over sin.

The Holy Spirit, our retainer will allow us to remain the beautiful creation that God has created and will help us to always be in right standing with God, aligned with Him.

Thank God for His braces and retainer!

God Always Gives Us What We Need

I was out with my mom today getting gifts for a baby shower that we had to go to a little later this afternoon. As I was out, I got a phone call from a friend telling me that I absolutely had to come to church with her tonight. A great message was going to be taught and I just had to be there.

The church is about 40 minutes away from my house and since I had a baby shower to go to, I didn't think there was any way I could go to the shower and then go home, get my car, and drive all the way there. So I told her that I didn't think it was possible. But then she said "Well, I'll give you a ride home." Now I had no excuse... I had to go.

This service was led by the youth in Master's Commission (a super awesome God-focused program) all of them about my age. And it was good. After the service was over there was just a time of prayer for different people in the church...

As I mentioned in my last blog, I've really been seeking the Lord in how my life is supposed to work out and if I'm really doing what he has called me to do. Everything has seemed to kind of be working out but the long-term picture hasn't been in focus.

I had been praying all through the service that God would speak to me and just bring me peace and reassure me that I'm on the right path.

My friend who invited me asked if I had been prayed for. I told her no and that I couldn't think of anything that I needed prayer for. She told me that I was wrong and that God definitely had something for me.

She brought me over to one of her friends and they began to pray. Immediately, her friend began to sob. And just said...

"The care and compassion that you have in your heart is really pleasing to God and He IS going to use it in a massive way. I don't know you, or anything about you but God wants you to know that He has big, no, HUGE plans for your life. Bigger than you can ever imagine. You are going in the right direction. Don't forget that he is guiding your steps. He wants you to remember Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, they are plans for good and not disaster, plans to give you a future and a hope. - He'll give you the direction and guidance you've been asking for in His time, not yours. Learn to be patient.

WOW!!! GOD ALWAYS COMES THROUGH AND HE ALWAYS GIVES US WHAT WE NEED.

How does it all work together?

Sometimes I wonder how all of the different pieces of my future are going to fit together. God is very particular about revealing certain aspects of our future to us, probably to keep us from freaking out. He knows that if he tells us too much at once we won't be able to handle it. Which leaves me wondering how the pieces will fit.

I know I am supposed to be a photojournalist.
I know I am supposed to travel.
I know I am supposed to be a wife.
I know I'm supposed to be a mother.
I know I'm supposed to work with youth.

So how does it all fit? How can I be a traveling photojournalist, mission worker when I have a husband, family, and youth group at home?

How does it all work together?

It works together for my good, that's how.

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose."
Romans 8:28

Spiritual Lessons from a Children's Book

After completing Prince Caspian, I thought to myself ‘Well, I might as well continue reading.’ So I did. Yesterday/night I read the entire next book, (The Voyage of the Dawn Treader). I had forgotten why it was my favorite of the Narnia series.

The scene takes place on a small sail ship which belongs to Prince Caspian. I generally don’t care too much for novels of sailing and such, but this one is different. The spiritual truth that is hidden behind every word will make your head spin and your heart beat faster!

I don’t want to tell you too much about the book because I don’t want to ruin the story for you. But I will tell you this, as I was lying in my bed last night (or this morning rather) at 2am reading the last page in of the book tears were streaming down my face. Not tears like the kind you cry when someone has hurt you, but rather the kind you cry when you realize that you have hurt someone and are truly repentant.

I realized the lack of love, hunger, and sincerity that I have in my relationship with God, not that my relationship with Him is bad (some would say it is good) but I know that it can be SO much more. He desires to have a relationship with me (and you) that we cannot even comprehend or begin to dream about.

READ THIS BOOK! You won’t regret the use of time.

I am starting my journey to obtain a deeper relationship with God; I encourage you not only to do the same but to join me. We can help one another.

If you’ve read or are reading the book, how has it changed you? If you aren’t, when is a time in your life that something as simple as a children’s book has brought you to your knees before the Lord?

Narnia, anyone?

When the first movie in The Chronicles of Narnia series, (The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe) came out I was really excited to see it. I had never even heard of the books, or the phenominal C.S. Lewis beforehand. After seeing the movie in the theater I immediately decided I needed to read the books. So I set out to Mardel's and bought a 767 page book that encompasses all of the Narnia books. It took me about a month to read the 7 books. Some friends of mine and I spent many hours nestled up by a warm fire reading. After finishing the books, I felt sad. Sad because I wouldn't be going on any more Narnian adventures.

Now the second movie (Prince Caspian) has come out which is actually the fourth book if you are reading in order of which they were intended, not published. I saw it and decided to brush up on the real story of Prince Caspian once again. I finished it just today, the books are an easy read, if you start from the beginning. Over all I had about 4 hours invested in it (but that's beside the point, I'm always getting off track with extra details).

After having read it again and noticing the large gaps between the movie and the book, I like the book better. Go figure, who can beat the literary genius, Lewis?

This is one thing I have been wondering about though: what does the land of Narnia symbolize? I know what most of the symbolic attributes represent such as the Lion, different talking animals, people, etc. but I don't know about the actual place. Is it really a world, maybe the Christian journey, I'm not sure.

So give me your Narnian smarts! What do you think the land of Narnia represents, or does it have a meaning at all?

Do I ever say no?

I was visiting with my good ol' friend, Anna, today and she asked me how one of my study groups went (I had told her previously that I had to go to one). I told her it went fine but I had a lot of work to do because my group delegated everything to do to me.

She told me that I need to learn to say "no" to people. . . that's a hard one for me. I like making people happy (even if it means doing more than my share of the work). I didn't really think that I had a problem with saying "no" until I got home and started working on all of the things that my group delegated me to do. Then I got a call from my sister-in-law asking me to come to dinner with her. Don't get me wrong. . . I wanted to go to dinner, I just knew that I didn't have the time. But I told her that I would because it would make her happy. So now I will stay up all night getting everything else finished.

I have a disease called Okay, whatever you want.

It's just like Dominoes, once you start saying "yes" you never can seem to stop. You just keep falling into something else.

I have a problem. . . and I'm going to start dealing with it.

Wow, what a week!

I am writing this blog mainly because I need a break from life. I don't even know where to begin to enlighten you about what's going on right now. Maybe I won't begin. Instead, I'll just say that I'm REALLY stressed (for lack of a better word) and could use a little prayer from all of you!

It always seems that when I can't handle one more thing, God wants to push me, so He throws a few more things my way.

When are some times in your life when God has pushed you beyond your limits?

Leave me some good tips for stress management/reduction!

I'm a bad blogger

Lots of people have been telling me that I haven't been blogging lately. . . thanks for pointing out the obvious. (chuckles to self)

I realize that I may not be the best blogger in the world because I don't really keep up with it as much as I should. But I haven't because there are a lot of other things in my life that have taken higher priority. Like: Jesus, school, work, homework, people, and sleeping. I think that maybe I should move it up on the list of priorities though because keeping in contact with you and self-disclosure is very important. So I am trying to do better, thus this blog that you are reading.

It's good to be back!

Movement

This is a gem of a quote that I found in Spiritual Leadership by J. Oswald Sanders. (I keep saying who it's by so you will read it!)

"There are only three kinds of people - those who are immovable, those who are movable, and those who move them!"
- Li Hung Chang

What kind of person are you? For real, think about it!

Day 4 - The Sequel

Where was I? Ah yes, in tears. So as I was laying there in my bed with tears streaming down my face muttering “I can’t do this, I can’t do this” (by the way I learned that when we cry we always latch onto one phrase and say it over and over such as “I did my best” or “I can’t do this” – thanks for educating me Dane!)

Anyway, back to the story. My mom was concerned as any mother would be at her child’s dismay and so saw fit to ask me what I couldn’t do. I replied through sobs “Life, being sick, how am I supposed to take a test that I haven’t studied for and can barely open my eyes to look at it. Life’s not fair and I can’t do this.”

In the midst of my tears I had an epiphany, or maybe God just spoke to me, I’m not sure which it was. Perhaps when we have an epiphany it is because God is speaking to us. I don’t claim to know seeing as how I am not clear on the matter. Either way the words were Charissa can’t, God can. In the midst of my blubbering; Charissa can’t, God can. Realizing that God is in control of our lives and we don’t have to be is such a liberating feeling.

So I dried my tears and took some more Tylenol in attempts to soothe my pains away. The Tylenol helped, but the true relief was knowing that God has my back and when I can’t do something that’s exactly the time that He steps in to cover me. Yeah, He’s pretty much amazing!

Have you had some times in your life when you simply couldn’t go on or weren’t capable of doing what was asked of you and God stepped in to show Himself faithful?

Day 4

So this is Wednesday. . . I began the throwing up, head aches, body aches, chills, fever, and general discomfort on Sunday. Here I am three days later and I still feel just as bad if not worse than day one. I had a test today. . . a BIG one. But I should back up a little and tell more of the story leading to the test.

Since I was a young tot, reading and studying has always made me feel kind of ill. Maybe just because I've never liked it, but I really think it is physiological. I've known about this test for a few days now and I just kept thinking 'I'll be well tomorrow, then I can study.' I'd been thinking that for a few days and then it hit me last night while I was laying on my couch. . . I don't have a tomorrow to study. I must study now. So I pulled out my trusty computer and began looking over my notes.

Have you ever had one of those head aches when you honestly feel like there must be a knife stabbed in through your skull into your brain, you just can't see it. Well I have.

As I was studying I began to feel as if there was a bomb in my head and it was counting down to explosion. Every pounding sensation I felt was one tick closer to detonation. I simply couldn't go on anymore. I knew that I had to stop. So I did. I quit studying.

I figured that going to bed and sleeping would bring me relief but it was to no avail. The pain was too much to handle. So I cut off my head. . . OK, I didn't but I wanted to. As I was in my bed my mom decided to come check on me. She came in my room and said, "How are you doin' sweetie?" the words weren't life changing but they brought about a flood of tears. Followed by "I can't do this, I can't do this."

Tune in tomorrow for the answer to the question in your head. . . 'WHY?' and for the ever important conclusion of what I learned.

Resurrection

I’ve been taking really good care of my “pet” today. Mainly because I absolutely hate nothingness, I can’t stand that feeling of being absolutely useless. I let my “pet” die, but I am trying to resurrect it today. And you guys thought I was going to be talking about the resurrection of Christ. (grins to self)

I’ve been pondering random things these past few days:

· Passion – what it is and how we lose it

· Decisions – big ones in life and the ways different people go about making them

· Personality – traits that I am immediately drawn to and others that I am repulsed by

· Friends – how come it is so difficult to find real ones and why does life have to change when you finally do

· Family – they are always there for me, even when I think I’ve done enough to make them stop

· Romantic Relationships – the lack of (BOO)

· School – why is it necessary again

What are your thoughts on what I’ve been pondering? Insightful comments? What do you find yourself thinking about?

Another Quote Worth Note

I’ve been reading more from Spiritual Leadership by J. Oswald Sanders. Quotes as astounding as this one do not need to coincide with heavy-handed words so I will keep this particular blog brief.

“Pessimism and leadership are at opposite ends of life’s attitudes. . . God’s ideal servant is optimistic until every part of God’s work is done.”

I Picked Up a Book Today

I’ve taken the opportunity while sick to catch up on some reading. I’ve been reading several different books but I chose to pick up Spiritual Leadership by J. Oswald Sanders today. My dad read it a while ago and has been trying to get me to read it for some time now; he says it will change my life.

I came across a passage in the book that I found to be truly profound. “True Leaders must be willing to suffer for the sake of objectives great enough to demand their wholehearted obedience.” Wholehearted obedience, what a concept, that means obeying with every portion of your mind, heart, will, and body. I generally obey God, but I don’t always want to. Sometimes it is simply because I know what the right thing to do is and I am doing it to be pleasing to Him. That is NOT wholehearted obedience.

So I began to wonder, ‘how can I wholeheartedly obey?’ This is a question that I haven’t quite found an absolute answer to yet. I know that by searching out God’s character more I will be more likely to follow His word without the thoughts of ‘man I really wish that I didn’t have to do this’. But it seems harder getting there than just that.

A quote from a little later in the book say, “People travel together; no one lives detached and alone.” So I am asking you all for your insight, I don’t want to walk alone. Help me out. What makes it easier for you to wholeheartedly obey?

There is more to come from this book as I get a chance to read and ponder it.